Humbling Yourself Before God

He did deliver them because they did humble themselves before him; and because they cried mightily unto him he did deliver them out of bondage; and thus doth the Lord work with his power in all cases among the children of men, extending the arm of mercy towards them that put their trust in him. -Mosiah 29:20

What keeps you from crying mightily to God for deliverance according to His will?
I think a part of me wonders if he will. Am I really worth the effort to him? I'm not sure thought, because those feelings are not very strong. Only if I really think about it. Does that mean I am fabricating them? I don't know.

I do think that I am not ready to ask, because I have not yet done all that I can do. If I had done everything within my power, then I think I would feel better about asking, because then I would better deserve it. I would have put in my time, so I would be more worthy of the blessing. I would have better showed him that I really mean it, so he would be more likely to bless me accordingly.

This may actually be a flaw in our culture. Whether "our" means American or LDS, I am not sure, but in the society I live in self-sufficiency is a very highly valued attribute. As such, I strive very hard to be able to accomplish the things I need to without outside support. For instance, yesterday the whole family was home sick. My wife called the Primary President to let her know that she would not be there. The loving president asked if they could bring us some Chicken Noodle Soup. Now, in fairness, they are our neighbors and the husband happens to be our home teacher, but that does not in any way belittle their offer. My wife got off the phone and told me that they would be bringing over food. It wasn't until that night that she told me that it had been "kind of hard" to accept the offer. Her first inclination was to just turn the offer down. To her credit, she did not (and the meal was amazing, by the way).

I think that trait in our society, the self-sufficiency, is a great thing. If we cannot help ourselves and pull our own weight, how are we supposed to help others? On the other hand, I think it is often overvalued to the point of nobody being willing to ask for assistance, even when they really need it. Pride is definitely a part of that, but I think the societal norm adds to the stigma of asking for help. Maybe if I get over the pride, the other half won't be as bad either.

What has kept you from seeking this kind of deliverance in the past?
Pride. Pride has definitely kept me from asking for help I need, both within the addiction and without. In the example I just named, I think I would have just politely said no. I also have a hard time really asking for help from the Lord. Let me rephrase that. I ask for help, but not deliverance. The request, should I think to make it, is usually along the lines of, "Please help me to overcome this." I do not pray for deliverance, rather ask for help in overcoming it myself.

It reminds me of Nephi. I must give credit where it is due though, my trainer on my mission pointed this out to me, but it is sure great. Nephi and his brothers have gone back to Jerusalem to procure wives (no complaining about going back that time) and are headed back to the wilderness. His brothers started murmuring again and end up tying him up. He is there for a considerable time and he prays as follows:

But it came to pass that I prayed unto the Lord, saying: O Lord, according to my faith which is in the, wilt thou deliver me from the hands of my brethren; yea, even give me strength that I may burst these bands with which I am bound. -1 Nephi 7:17-

Now, to Nephi's credit, he does ask for deliverance (and it is granted), but he is also asking for strength to do it on his own. Or at least to appear so. The Lord has other plans.

And it came to pass that when I had said these words, behold the bands were loosed from off my hands and feet, and I stood before my brethren, and I spake unto them again. -1 Nephi 7:18-

Sometimes, I also have to let the Lord just deliver me. It is great when He can add to my own abilities to the point that I can accomplish it, but sometimes he just has to deliver me. Pure and simple. I have to be willing to accept that, as well as to ask for it. I also have to remember to do it.

In what ways can you learn to trust in God?
I think part of it is just practicing. I need to practice in moments when I am not struggling with the addiction. In moments when the decisions are easier, asking for help will help to recondition me to ask for it when things are not so easy. As we talked about in my last counseling session, I have a lot of conditioning toward the addiction. I need to practice in normal situations, so I will be able to do it in times of duress.

To humble yourself is a decisions you make. Satan may try to get you to believe that although God helped others, he won't help you because you are helpless and hopeless. Recognize this lie for what it is. In truth, you are a child of God. How can this knowledge help you humble yourself?
If I believe I am hopeless, then I also believe that God has lost hope in me. If I am a hopeless cause, then why would He help me anyway? It would just be a waste of His time. However, if I believe that I am a child of God it does two things. First, it makes me realize that I am not hopeless. That divine potential has a lot of worth. Even if I am in a really bad spot, the Lord can see that I have potential to be better and wants me to accomplish that. If I can see it, then I can feel like I am "worthy" of asking.

Second, it establishes His love for me. Yes, He abhors sin. The sin is not me, though. As His son, He is willing to look past that to help me. He cannot look past it in His judgment of whether I can have Eternal Life or not, but He can in whether He will assist. In fact, He is more than happy to look past my weaknesses and failings to lend a helping hand. If He does so, and I do my part, He won't have to pass that final judgment and that is a win-win situation.