PASG

Hello. I am Sean. I am an addict to pornography, masturbation and lustful thoughts.

I think I have already mentioned how much I missed a Pornography Addiction Support Group. When we lived in Logan, both my wife and I had been able to attend. Since moving back to Blanding, that had changed. Sure, there was a General Addiction Support Group, but it never quite felt the same. I also mentioned that I had found a PASG that I could attend via phone, but wasn't sure if that was just a cop out. Well, I did it last night and I think it was a good choice. It was nice to be talking to others with very similar problems. I also noticed a couple of things.

The first one is that in the last two years, since I was able to attend a PASG, most have begun to say that they suffer from an addiction to lustful thoughts. Interestingly, I have come to the conclusion for myself within the last week or so, but I was unsure how to phrase it. Was throwing it onto my normal list making that too long. Should a just say that I have sexual addictions, which was true enough? I have decided that those three sum up my problem pretty well.

A second thing I noticed is how much realization has come about the trauma that spouses are going through. Multiple people talked about the trauma recovery their wives are going through. I throw my lot in with them and am so thankful she is doing so. In fact, if it hadn't been for her hard work and research, I would probably still be in denial about needing to pick up the recovery trail again.

The third thing I noticed is that I think I am ready to move on to step 2. Maybe it is premature, maybe it is overdue, but I think I am there. This is my third time starting into the Addiction Recovery Program and both times before I made it to step 4, then never finished. I wonder if that is because I did not do the intervening steps thoroughly enough, so I am taking it slow this time. I want to make sure I spend enough time on each step. Does that mean my honesty no longer needs help? No. I will continue to work on that as well, but I think I am ready to add the next principle to the mix.

~Sean~